Inspired.

The word power is a common word in everyday speech and we think very little of its meaning, taking for granted its connotations. Its meaning is for many unproblematic, so insignificant that it's hardly worth any consideration. When one comes to some understanding of what power is, more important questions become apparent; how is power distributed and what are the mechanisms of power?

I want you to try and step outside of the world as we know it and your interpretation of 'power' and think of it not as something that some people have, like physical strength or a bad temper as I don't feel this is the most useful way to think of power. Power should be thought of as existing in social relationships, within the realm of social interaction. Power exists within social relationships and certainly not outside of them. Power does not exist within people nor does it exist externally, floating about landing on the unsuspecting. It is a result of an exchange between individuals, groups, societies - and thus can be changed.

Anybody who knows my political views will know that this notion of power is extremely important to me. It has always baffled me how we, as a people, do not use our strength in numbers more frequently to overthrow corrupt governments, overturn ridiculous parliament bills, ultimately prevent needless suffering across the world. I understand that there is a lot going on, and maybe causes have to be chosen wisely in order to mobilise a movement. But, what we have to remember is that there are some pretty big things going on across the world that quite simply make my blood boil! This is happening, right now, as you read this blog. Yes, it may not be on your street, but it is on somebody's street and I'd like to think that if it was mine, people would be there to help, I don't know about you? 

We, as humans, have done some pretty remarkable things, take a look at the Civil Rights Movement USA, the end of Apartheid in South Africa, the end of Nazi reign in Europe - let's not underestimate what we can do if we put our mind to it. That being the imperative word - if.

I have genuinely been inspired by recent events around the world. Admittedly in Egypt, a lot of people have suffered and for 18 days the stubbornness of one elderly man has been pitted against the will of millions. Thousands of people took to the streets triggered by widespread unrest in the country over rising levels of unemployment, poverty and corruption, this was televised internationally and many people across the world have nervously awaited the result (myself being one!). United they stood and determined they were, eventually today they emerged victorious - Hosni Mubarak has stepped down as President of Egypt.

There is a huge sense jubilation across the world and particularly throughout the Middle East and North Africa, including in Tunisia, where people overthrew their own president last month.


Start of a revolution? I think that's a definite possibility.

I say, watch this space because we may be entering one of the most significant periods in political history and it's safe to say I'm excited!

Power to the people!

Live for the Present.

As I enter Liverpool Lime Street I realise it's rush hour and I'm on the underground, I love the hustle and bustle, to me it's one of the only times Liverpool truly feels like a city, often sat idly in Manchester's shadows.  I'm in my element, letting the atmosphere soak into every pore of my skin, I close my eyes, really feeling the tension of the day ahead for the businessmen and professionals alike, the demands they must have placed upon them when I realise that the tension isn't giving me that warm fuzzy feeling it usually does, there's something wrong; people are moaning, they are tutting and I snap out of it!  It is then that I see what has caused this: a woman struggling to contain her small child to the right of the escalator, and God forbid that a person has to wait those two extra minutes for the machinery to fulfil it's purpose!  An incredibly rude gentleman (although a gentleman is definitely NOT what he was) rather bluntly asked/demanded that she ensure her child is on the right so that he may get by.  Too which the red-faced woman meekly apologised and reprimanded her child.

This got me thinking, are we losing the ability to enjoy life, to see the wider picture simply because we are in too much of a rush?

In today's world we feel stressed, anxious and constantly on edge.  Why is this?  What has happened to make so many of us frantic and in a hurry to do everything all at once?  Surely with more time-saving technologies around than ever before, why is it that many of us still complain we don’t have time to relax and enjoy life?

We all need to slow down - to seriously slow down. 

This is hard for many of us.  Even when we have a quiet moment, we are busy planning what to do the next hour, the next day, often the next year - I'm hugely guilty of this myself.  But in doing this we are not living in the present moment,  and because of this, we are not able to enjoy our lives as fully as we are capable of.

Our moments of joy are often few and far between. We don’t laugh as often as we should and if the commuters are anything to go by some of us have even forgotten how to smile!  We’re simply too busy to do these things.  Too busy, really?! Perhaps we had better acknowledge some harsh truths: we will never be able to finish everything, those plans can never all be done.  Even if they were, there is always something new which will demand our attention.

Perhaps we keep ourselves busy to avoid confronting this fact.  Maybe we don’t want to think about what really matters in life.  Because life is so short, we make ourselves too busy to even sit back and enjoy it. I believe it takes time to learn how to live now, to be fully aware and present in each moment.  Put in the effort and make the time now, because it will benefit you greatly throughout your entire life.

If I can try, the ultimate planner, then so can you.

Spread your wings and fly.

Go on, live a little, I dare you!

'Beauty'

Let me tell you about something I saw just the other day, a group of 6/7 twenty-somethings sat in a bar sneering at a girl who walked in.  Yes, I know what you're thinking, surely they're old enough to know better, I thought the same.  Regardless of this they didn't stop and were relentless in their sniggering.  For what reason, I have no idea, there was nothing that stood out, not that it would be a valid excuse.  It really started to grate on me, the desperation and cruelness that was entwined within this situation.  I've observed many women like this - I fear its perhaps a Western phenomenon, but doubt it - emaciated, their faces hardened masks, as if permanently set against the straining of vigorous exercise.  Often rude, crass, wearing their slim bodies like some passport for poor behaviour.  But for me, despite the deprivation, the starvation, the overexertion, they are still unattractive to the point of being somewhat repellent, with their nasty sneers and cutting comments.  Surely a sign that they are lonely, unhappy, unsatisfied - and hence the bitter and mean.

Strangely, I don't really blame them, I mean, true, they have a right to stand up and be counted.
To say NO I will not be a slave to the media industry, but that's difficult when so many people around you won't.  It's a powerful industry that effectively attempts to shape who we are, inform us of normality and 'helps us' to be that person we aspire to be, we are weak in it's prescence.

We, as a women, have been sold a concept that fails us miserably. 
Spend every moment of your free time fretting about your body, the media urges, exercise frequently, buy diet books, beautify, pluck, wax, and a man will find you attractive and love you forever.  Don't ever for one second worry about being loving or loveable, about kindness, comraderie with your fellow females or finding fulfillment on some deeper spiritual, emotional level.  Instead just try to take up as little space as possible, be as small as possible, or you will be reviled by every industry poised to make money from you - the fitness, diet and even 'medical' industry.  Warning: they'll steal your money and your self-esteem.  You'll give it all in the hope of achieving this greater being and you will still be unhappy.  In spite of all evidence to the contrary, you'll buy into these ideas, believe wholeheartedly, build lives and lifestyles around them.

Now, I know, I can't exactly sit here on my high horse and pretend that I don't care about the way I look.
Of course I do, that's natural.  But do I care whether I'm a size zero, whether I have this seasons latest fashions, if I'm up to date on what celebrity is sleeping with what other celebrity this week? - NO. 
And why?
Because I'm too wrapped up in my own world, developing my mind and soul for no-one other than me, how empowering is that.  And when it comes to attracting a man, I'm afraid he will just have to take what he sees, or leave it, either way I'm not fussed, because the kind of man that wants the media's image of a woman is not the kind of man I want.

Action, not words.

Too many people are happy to sit back and complain about the state of the world...  Everyone's a critic, everyone 'could do that better', well go ahead do it!
No, you will just sit there in your armchair moaning to an empty room... 
What does that change? Who is listening? Nobody!

We live in a democracy, maybe it's about time we started using the power that this holds to bring about change. Maybe it's time we started standing up for the rights of those who cannot stand for themselves.

I want to be their voice.

Don't you?!!

Surely by the power of love we can overcome all the injustices that exist in the world. 
I truly believe this.

Let me share with you one of my recent experiences of love, love as I've never experienced it before - in its purest of forms, at its most natural, most beautiful.

 It is here that I introduce to you, class 3 and 4, of Akal Boys School, Rajasthan, India.

 These eleven young boys taught me more about 'love' in the 10 weeks I spent teaching them than the previous 1159 I have spent on this Earth.

They taught me how to love, with an open heart - not because I had to, but because I wanted to, I really wanted to.  I can't say exactly when it happened but I can tell you it happened pretty quickly and it was unstoppable. 

If I can be so conceited to quote my own diary, I want to share with you a small paragraph I wrote in the first 2 weeks of my time in India:

'The way I see things is changing before my very eyes, the children are doing this to me; they are beautiful, so beautiful.  I feel like I can see into their souls, that yearn for a better life, whatever that may be to them.  When I look at them, I'm embarrassed- embarrassed that I moan about the little things, embarrassed that I have all I have, that I do not need.  The question is about want and need, we can have whatever we want whilst they struggle to gain what they need, what they deserve!'

It think it's time for us as a people to start making some changes.  To look around and see that the old way isn't working so it's on us, this generation, to do what we can, to survive as a people and come together through the unity of love - a power that can overcome the greatest of evils.



Process of understanding.

I am alone with my keyboard again, weaving something of a universe culled from both my experiences and my imagination.  I struggle with the idea that nothing I can imagine could compare to the actual recent events of my life; what I've seen, heard and felt.  But I write because I have to, because I cannot do anything but this.  I must metabolise my experience on the blank page, put it down, order it, control it in my way.  This is how I understand the world.  How I answer the question: why?

Why?
It's the word that drives me, the question, the answer just around the corner if only I can get there.  I write, letting a river of possibility flow through me, letting go of all my deeply stored energy pass from the air onto the page.  Some people fear the enormity of the blankness before them, that empty white field.  I live for it, it excites me.

People ask;
'Is it just about the knowing?'
'Surely ignorance is bliss sometimes?'
'Is it worth it to know?'

Could anything be more worth it?! 

In every character, every heart beating, there is a unique universe, every shade of black and white you could imagine.  There is obviously the very potential of finding darkness, but alongside there is the potential to turn from darkness and walk into the light. 

I have to go there, into the shadow of unknowing. 
I'd rather die enveloped in the darkness than bask a lifetime ignorant in the light.
But maybe that's just me?